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Secrets to marriage 白头到老的五大秘诀
人们往往可以理解一段婚姻为什么会失败，因为失败的婚姻确实很多；但说清楚一段婚姻为什么能成功却要困难得多。虽然每个选择婚姻的人都想好好过日子，但为何有些夫妻能相濡以沫，而有些夫妻却过得鸡犬不宁？
婚姻的不幸各有原因，而幸福的婚姻却有其共同的秘诀。让我们来看看几对快乐的老年夫妻与我们分享的心得体会。
For Ozzy and Sharon Osbourne, it's perseverance. For Jimmy and Rosalynn Carter, it's maintaining separate work lives. For Doyle and Louise Brunson, having separate bank accounts helps.
A former first lady, a rock star who's been in and out of rehab more times than he can remember, and a professional poker player can all offer considerable insight into the mysterious workings of marriage. After all, their wisdom is gleaned from decades of conjugal bliss.
OK, maybe it wasn't always bliss. But each of them has stayed married -- to the same person -- for a very long time. And each considers his or her marriage to be happy, strong and mutually supportive.
In other words, they beat the odds.
It is often possible to understand why a marriage fails, as so many do. It is much more difficult, though, to elucidate why one succeeds. Why do some couples thrive, while others fizzle or flame out, despite their best intentions?
When I recently met former first lady Rosalynn Carter, who has been married to Jimmy Carter for 63 years. I couldn't resist asking how they made such a perfect union.
Mrs. Carter replied that she and her husband had gone through two periods that were tough. "First, well, let me just say: Don't ever write a book with your husband," she said.
She went on to explain that the period after she and Mr. Carter left the White House and returned to their hometown of Plains, Ga., also put a strain on their relationship. Her husband felt adrift after failing to win re-election, she said. He would often interrupt her while she was at work in her home office, asking her to have a cup of coffee with him and chat.
"We learned that it was important to our marriage for each of us to always have our own work, our own projects," said Mrs. Carter, 82.
I asked my parents, who just celebrated their 46th wedding anniversary, why their marriage lasted so long. My dad said he had no idea. "Your mother did all the hard work," he admitted. Mom agreed, and divulged her marital secret: "forgiveness."
Happily married people believe they married their soul mates, and for good reason. Even marrying the right person gets you only part way. Ask the couples themselves, and they'll likely credit some combination of hard work and sheer blind luck. No one says that every day, or even every year, was rosy. And there are plenty of long marriages that are unhappy. But there are some strategies that happily married couples say work:
-- Find the middle ground. "It's all give and take," says Marlene Critch, a retired hospital director in Tucson. She met her husband Bill on a blind date in 1959. He took her on a picnic with a therm they married two months later.
Flash ahead 50 years. The Critches have raised two daughters in Seattle and weathered his severe heart condition. They swim together each morning, and he reads her children's books when she has trouble falling asleep at night.
Compromise, they say, got them through the good and bad times. Mr. Critch, 75, says he compromised by quitting the Air Force early in their marriage, because it bothered her that he was away from home so much. (Press him for more concessions, and he says, "Miso soup.")
Ms. Critch, 74, says she made her own compromise by agreeing to retire to Arizona, where her husband preferred the climate. (She wanted to stay in Seattle to be close to their daughters.)
"If each person can give 75 percent, you've got 150 percent," says Ms. Critch. Her husband agrees. "Many men would call that wussy," he says. "But I don't because I value her more than anything else in the world."
Similarly, Jan and Len Konkel, who have been married for 62 years, long ago made a pact to never argue over anything that wasn't very important, saving their battles for things like how to raise their three children. "Everything else is minor and can be settled in a discussion," says Ms. Konkel, 84.
Her husband, well, agrees. "I say 'Yes ma'am' and 'No ma'am' a lot," says Mr. Konkel, 88.
-- Be funny. On the night in 1967 that Jackie and Ken Egan met at a dance club in Newton, Mass., he asked her for a kiss. She declined: "I don't know you," she told him. "And my kisses are like Lay's potato chips -- you wouldn't want just one."
The Egans, who live in Marshfield, Mass., and have four children, just celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary on Monday. Ms. Egan says laughter helps them deal with issues that would otherwise drive them nuts -- such as Mr. Egan's fussy eating habits and forgetfulness about putting the toilet seat down. Or Ms. Egan's inability to let her husband finish a story without interrupting him, or her many knickknacks.
"You need to learn to find the humor in each other's annoying habits. It helps you keep the affection," says Ms. Egan, 69.
-- Keep (some) secrets. When poker legend Doyle Brunson met his wife Louise at a country-and-western club in Texas in 1961, he told her he gambled for a living. And she accepted him for who he is. "Love is the most important thing," says Louise Brunson, 78. "You have to love your spouse more than life itself."
The Brunsons, who live in Las Vegas, have stood by each other through some serious trials in their 47 years of marriage, including the death of a daughter and an armed robbery of their home, during which they were tied up at gunpoint.
"You have to go forward, you can't go back," says Mr. Brunson, 76. Even so, the Brunsons don't share everything. He does not discuss his business with her. "I have won and lost millions of dollars without her knowing," he says. Ms. Brunson says that's just fine with her. "I have my own bank account," she says.
-- Never, ever give up. This tip is really important, so pay attention. Sharon Osbourne says it is how she stayed with husband Ozzy for 28 years and counting. And she's married to the Prince of Darkness. He bit the head off of a live bat, for God's sake. (Ditto a dove.)
He also spent years strung out on drugs and alcohol. Never mind the groupies and the near-fatal overdoses. This man set fire to his house, passed out on a freeway median, and once tried to strangle his wife.
Ms. Osbourne, for her part, tried to run him over with a car, smashing his gold records with a hammer and taking out a restraining order. "We became like a soap opera," says Ms. Osbourne, 57, who is her husband's manager.
And yet she stuck by her man. Why? Because she felt he was a good person when sober and that he would kick his addictions one day. And she still believes he is her soul mate. ("Twice recently we've had the same dream on the same night," she says.)
"I went into marriage thinking it was forever. So I was stubborn," says Ms. Osbourne who has three children with her husband.
Mr. Osbourne, who had been married once before, finally did sober up 'six or seven years' ago, he says. He says he is very glad his wife stuck it out. "You don't throw in the towel at the first sign of trouble," he says.
And so Mr. Osbourne says he has made a point of telling his wife he loved her every single day -- no matter where he was in the world, no matter how drunk or high. "She sometimes said 'Drop dead' or 'F -- off,'" he says. "But at least if you are arguing, you are talking. If you stop talking, it's time to call it a day."
-- Stay alive. My sister, a doctor, told me about one of her patients, a 92-year-old woman who showed up for her appointment with her husband, who is 94. They said they have been married for almost 70 years.
My sister, highly impressed, asked the couple the secret to their union's longevity. And they looked at each other for a long moment. Then the wife spoke: "Eh, neither of us died."
（来源：爱词霸  编辑：Julie）
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沪江成语大全精选白头偕老的意思及对应发音、白头偕老是什么意思、造句、近义词、反义词、英语翻译信息，由gtl535于日添加。
中文发音：
bái tóu xié lǎo。
成语解释：白头：指头发全白了；偕：共同；老：老年。夫妻共同生活到头发白了的老年。成语出处：清 沈复《浮生六记 闺房记乐》：“独怪老年夫妇相视如仇者，不知何意？或曰：‘非如是，焉得白头偕老哉！”成语造句：婚礼上，来宾们由衷地祝愿一对新人白头偕老。成语使用：主谓式；作谓语、宾语、定语；用作祝颂之辞发音技巧：偕，不能读作“jiē”。书写技巧：偕，不能写作“皆”。褒贬解析：属中性成语　近义词：、　反义词：英语翻译：remain a devoted couple to the end of their lives
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*2017白头偕老是什么意思、造句、近义词、反义词、英语翻译信息由沪江网提供。英语情感故事：白头偕老，相伴一生
英语情感故事：白头偕老，相伴一生
学习啦【英语故事】 编辑：若木
　　One fine day, an old couple around the age of 70, walks into a lawyer's office. Apparently, they are there to filea divorce. Lawyer was very puzzled, after having a chat with them, he got their story.
　　This couple had been quarreling all their 40 over years of marriage nothing ever seems to go right.
　　They hang on because of their children, afraid that it might affect their up-bringing. Now, all their children have already grown up, have their own family, there's nothing else the old couple have to worry about, all they wanted is to lead their own life free from all these years of unhappiness from their marriage, so both agree on a divorce.
　　Lawyer was having a hard time trying to get the papers done, because he felt that after 40 years of marriage at the age of 70, he couldn't understand why the old couple would still wants a divorce.
　　While they were signing the papers, the wife told the husband. &I really love you, but I really can't carry on anymore, I'm sorry.&
　　&It's OK, I understand.& said the husband. Looking at this, the lawyer suggested a dinner together, just three of them, wife thought, why not, since they are still going be friends.
　　At the dining table, there was a silence of awkwardness(尴尬，笨拙).
　　The first dish was roasted chicken, immediately, the old man took the drumstick(鸡腿) for the old lady. &Take this, it's your favorite.&
　　Looking at this, the lawyer thought maybe there's still a chance, but the wife was frowningwhen she answer. &This is always the problem, you always think so highly of yourself, never thought about how I feel, don't you know that I hate drumsticks?&
　　Little did she know that, over the years, the husband have been trying all ways to please her, little did she know that drumsticks was the husband's favorite.
　　Little did he know that she never thought he understand her at all, little did he know that she hates drumsticks even though all he wants is the best for her.
　　That night, both of them couldn't sleep, toss and turn(辗转反侧), toss and turn. After hours, the old man couldn't take it anymore, he knows that he still loves her, and he can't carry on life without her, he wants her back, he wants to tell her, he is sorry, he wanted to tell her, &I love you.&
　　He picks up the phone, started dialing her number. Ringing never stops. He never stop dialing.
　　On the other side, she was sad, she couldn't understand how come after all these years, he still doesn't understand her at all, she loves him a lot, but she just can't take it any- more. Phone's ringing, she refuses to answer knowing that it's him. &What's the point of talking now that it's over. I have asked for it and now. I want to keep it this way, if not I will lose face. &She thought. Phone still ringing. She has decided to pull out the cord.
　　Little did she remember, he had heart problems.
　　The next day, she received news that he had passed away. She rushed down to his apartment, saw his body, lying on the couch still holding on to the phone. He had a heart attack when he was still trying to get thru her phone line.
　　As sad as she could be. She will have to clear his belongings. When she was looking thru the drawers, she saw this insurance policy, dated from the day they got married,beneficiary(受益人) is her. Together in that file there's this note.
　　&To my dearest wife, by the time you are reading this, I'm sure I'm no longer around, I bought this policy for you, though the amount is only $100k, I hope it will be able to help me continue my promise that I have made when we got married, I might not be around anymore, I want this amount of money to continue taking care of you, just like the way I will if I could have live longer. I want you to know I will always be around, by your side. I love you.&
　　Tears flowed like river.
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May you two live together till old and grey.
愿你们两口儿白头偕老。
At the wedding party, the bride and the bridegroom expressed that they would live in harmony and mutual respect and grow old together.
新娘和新郎表示要互敬互爱, 白头偕老。
May you two always be in love!
祝你们永浴爱河，白头偕老！
Wish you both a hundred years of happiness and golden love.
祝福新人白头偕老，永享黄金爱情。
I raise my glass to the happy pair, wishing them a long life together and with many children.
我举杯祝这幸福的一对白头偕老，儿孙满堂。
I raise my glass to the happy pair, wishing them a long life together.
我为这幸福的一对举杯，愿他们白头偕老。
James and Lisa, I wish you many happy years together.
詹姆士和丽莎，我祝福你们白头偕老，爱河永浴。
I raise my glass to the happy pair, wishing them a long life together and many children.
我为这一对幸福的人举杯，愿他们白头偕老，多子多孙。
Adeli Penguins fall hopelessly in love and their feelings are so strong that they stay with their partners for the rest of their lives.
埃德里企鹅会不可救药地陷入的爱情旋涡之中，忠贞不渝，白头偕老。
They're a real old Darly and Joan-there's no company they enjoy better than each other's.
他俩真是一对白头偕老的恩爱夫妻——他们形影相随，从不分离。
She must see if she really wants you, wants to keep you and to have no other man all her life.
她必须确定是否真正需要你，和你白头偕老，终身不再找别的男人。
Best wishes on your marriage.
We hope you will have nothing but joy and happiness in your life together.
在你们新婚之际，让我们衷心祝愿你们白头偕老，幸福快乐。
Congratulations to you, our bride and bridegroom! May every good luck and happiness accompany you throughout the journey of life.
恭贺新郎、新娘!祝你们在漫长的人生旅程中白头偕老，永远幸福、快乐。
The girl had never known the shade of the old Cypress, or heard the calling of faithful companions.
女儿既未领略过那株老柏树的浓荫，也从没听过白头偕老的夫妻的教诲。
You make a hot combination. Lustful but not lasting due to your jealous nature.
天蝎－白羊：你们是一对热恋情侣。然而欲望太多，嫉妒心强的蝎子不可能和羊儿白头偕老。
From first falling in love to growing old together it's like a bunch of grapes: There is always just one best grape remaining at the end to provide hope.Isn't that wonderful?
从恋爱到白头偕老，好比一串葡萄，总有最好的一颗，最好的只有一颗，留着做希望，多么好？
We all rejoice with you on the occasion of your engagement and wish you both a lifetime of happiness.
在你们订婚的大喜日子里，我们全体和你们一起共享欢乐，祝你们白头偕老，幸福美好。
At last, I will congratulate the young couple on their marriage and wish them a long life of happiness together!
我想每一位都会和我一同祝福他们二有最美满的生活,祝这对新人永浴爱河,幸福美满,白头偕老!}