为什么我出街大概14,15,16岁的女孩都女孩看着我快速眨眼

为什么我出街大概14,15,16岁的女孩都看着我_百度宝宝知道讲者介绍Sheryl Sandberg是脸书的首席运营官,她在对全球最大的社交网站进行商业化运营的同时,也致力于保证用户的快乐与体验。讲稿全文So for any of us in this room today, let's start out by admitting we're lucky. We don't live in the world our mothers lived in, our grandmothers lived in, where career choices for women were so limited. And if you're in this room today, most of us grew up in a world where we have basic civil rights, and amazingly, we still live in a world where some women don't have them. 今天在座的各位, 我们首先要承认,我们是幸运的。 我们没有生活在我们母亲和祖母生活过的那个世界,当时女性的职业选择非常有限。今天在座的各位,我们大多数人成长于一个女性的基本公民权利得到保障的世界。令人惊讶的是,在我们生活的这个时代,依然有些女性不享有基本的公民权利。But all that aside, we still have a
problem, and it's a real problem. And the problem is this: Women are not
making it to the top of any profession anywhere in the world. The
numbers tell the story quite clearly. 190 heads of state -- nine are
women. Of all the people in parliament in the world, 13 percent are
women. In the corporate sector, women at the top, C-level jobs, board
seats -- tops out at 15, 16 percent. The numbers have not moved since
2002 and are going in the wrong direction. And even in the non-profit
world, a world we sometimes think of as being led by more women, women
at the top: 20 percent.但除上所述,我们还有一个问题,一个实际的问题,那就是:在世界的各个地方、各个领域,女性都未能到达顶层。以下这些数据可以非常清楚地说明这一点。个国家元首中,只有9位是女性;世界上所有议会成员中,只有是女性议员;在企业,女性做到高管、级职位、董事会席位的比例是、。年到现在,这些数字都没有增长过,反而表现出下降的趋势。即使在那些我们通常认为被更多女性所领导的非盈利领域,女性领导人的比例也只有20%。We also have another problem, which is that women face harder choices between professional success and personal fulfillment. A recent study in the U.S. showed that, of married senior managers, two-thirds of the married men had children and only one-third of the married women had children.我们还面临着另一个问题,就是女性在职业成功和个人价值实现中所面临的艰难选择。美国最近一个研究表明,在已婚的高管人员当中,三分之二的已婚男性高管有孩子,而已婚女性高管有孩子的比例,只有三分之一。A couple of years ago, I was in New York,
and I was pitching a deal, and I was in one of those fancy New York
private equity offices you can picture. And I'm in the meeting -- it's
about a three-hour meeting -- and two hours in, there needs to be that
bio break, and everyone stands up, and the partner running the meeting
starts looking really embarrassed. And I realized he doesn't know where
the women's room is in his office. So I start looking around for moving
boxes, figuring they just moved in, but I don't see any. And so I said,
&Did you just move into this office?& And he said, &No, we've been here
about a year.& And I said, &Are you telling me that I am the only woman
to have pitched a deal in this office in a year?& And he looked at me,
and he said, &Yeah. Or maybe you're the only one who had to go to the
bathroom.&几年前,我去纽约参加一个谈判会议,会议地点在一个私募股权办事处——你们可以想象到的那种别致的办公场所。那次会议持续了3个小时。会议进行了小时后,有个短暂的休息时间,所有人都站起来放松一下,这时会议的组织者开始露出尴尬的神情。我意识到,他居然不知道女洗手间在哪里。我想他们大概是才搬进来不久,所以我开始四处寻找移动厕所,但也没能找到。于是我问他,你是刚搬来里吗?他说,不是,我们在这儿已经有一年了。我说,你是在说,这一年来,我是唯一一个来这里谈生意的女性吗?他看着我,说到,是的。或者说你是唯一停留这么长时间的。So the question is, how are we going to fix this? How do we change these numbers at the top? How do we make this different? I want to start out by saying, I talk about this -- about keeping women in the workforce -- because I really think that's the answer.所以问题是,我们该怎样解决这个问题? 我们如何增加这些高管职位中女性所占的比例?我们怎样改变现状?我首先想说,我谈论女性就职问题,是因为我的确认为我们得找到答案。In the high-income part of our workforce,
in the people who end up at the top -- Fortune 500 CEO jobs, or the
equivalent in other industries -- the problem, I am convinced, is that
women are dropping out. Now people talk about this a lot, and they talk
about things like flextime and mentoring and programs companies should
have to train women. 在劳动领域的高收入群体当中,在世界500强的CEO或者其他行业处在同等位置的高管人员当中,我确信,存在女性被排除在外的问题。如今,人们也常常谈到这个问题,他们讨论最多的,是弹性工作时间和职业指导,或者公司应该为女性安排的培训计划。I want to talk about none of that today, even
though that's all really important.Today I want to focus on what we can do as individuals. What are the messages we need to tell ourselves? What are the messages we tell the women that work with and for us? What are the messages we tell our daughters?今天我不想谈论这些,尽管它们都非常重要。今天我想关注的是,作为个人我们能做什么。我们要传达给自己什么样的信息?我们要传达给女同事们以及我们女儿什么样的信息?
Now, at the outset, I want to be very clear that this speech comes with no judgments. I don't have the right answer. I don't even have it for myself. I left San Francisco, where I live, on Monday, and I was getting on the plane for this conference. And my daughter, who's three, when I dropped her off at preschool, did that whole hugging-the-leg, crying, &Mommy, don't get on the plane& thing. This is hard. I feel guilty sometimes. I know no women, whether they're at home or whether they're in the workforce, who don't feel that sometimes. So I'm not saying that staying in the workforce is the right thing for everyone.首先,我想说明,这个演讲不带有任何评判。我也不会提供什么正确答案,因为我自己也不知道什么样的答案是正确的。我住在加利福尼亚,周一,我要坐飞机赶来这里参加这次大会。当我送三岁的女儿到幼儿园时,她紧紧抱住我的腿,哭喊着,妈咪,不要上飞机之类的话。这个过程很艰难。有时我感到内疚。我知道无论是家庭主妇,还是职业女性,谁都会有这样内疚的时刻。所以我不会对所有人说,呆在职场是件正确的事。My talk today is about what the messages are if you do want to stay in the workforce, and I think there are three. One, sit at the table. Two, make your partner a real partner. And three, don't leave before you leave. 今天我要讲的是,如果你真的想呆在职场,我有条建议。一,坐在桌旁。二,让你的伴侣成为一个真正的伴侣。三,在你离开前别放弃。Number one: sit at the table. Just a
couple weeks ago at Facebook, we hosted a very senior government
official, and he came in to meet with senior execs from around Silicon
Valley. And everyone kind of sat at the table. He had these two women
who were traveling with him pretty senior in his department, and I kind
of said to them, &Sit at the table. Come on, sit at the table,& and they
sat on the side of the room. 第一,坐在桌旁。几周前,脸书接待了一批非常高级别的政府官员,他(马克扎克伯格)与来自硅谷周围的高级主管们见面,几乎每个人都坐在桌边。与他同来的两在部门中也担任非常高的职位。我对她们说,来吧,坐到桌子旁边来。她们却坐在了屋子的一边。When I was in college, my senior year, I
took a course called European Intellectual History. Don't you love that
kind of thing from college? I wish I could do that now. And I took it
with my roommate, Carrie, who was then a brilliant literary student --
and went on to be a brilliant literary scholar -- and my brother --
smart guy, but a water-polo-playing pre-med, who was a sophomore. 我在大四的时候选修了一门欧洲思想史的课程。你们喜欢大学的这类课程吗?我真希望现在还能上这门课。我当时和室友卡丽以及我的弟弟一起修的这门课。卡丽那时是一个才华横溢的文学专业学生,日后她成为了一名杰出的文学家。我的弟弟,他是一个聪明的小伙子,爱打水球,当时在念医学预科,大二。The three of us take this class together. And then Carrie reads all the books in the original Greek and Latin, goes to all the lectures. I read all the books in English and go to most of the lectures. My brother is kind of busy. He reads one book of 12 and goes to a couple of lectures, marches himself up to our room a couple days before the exam to get himself tutored. 我们三人一起选修这门课。卡丽读了所有希腊文和拉丁文的原版书籍没有缺席任何一次课我读了所有英文的书,大部分的课都去了;我弟弟比较忙,本书他只读了一本,上了几次课,在考试的前几天,他还来我们房间寻求辅导。The three of us go to the exam together,
and we sit down. And we sit there for three hours -- and our little blue
notebooks -- yes, I'm that old. We walk out, we look at each other, and
we say, &How did you do?& And Carrie says, &Boy, I feel like I didn't
really draw out the main point on the Hegelian dialectic.& And I say,
&God, I really wish I had really connected John Locke's theory of
property with the philosophers that follow.& And my brother says, &I got
the top grade in the class.& &You got the top grade in the class? You
don't know anything.& 我们三个一起去参加考试,我们坐下来考了有个小时,带着我们的小蓝笔记本——是的,我确实很老派。当我们走出考场,看着对方,互相询问,你考得怎样?卡丽说,伙计,我觉得自己没有完全答出黑格尔辩证法的主要内容。我说,天啊,我真希望我考试时能想到学习过的洛克的产权理论以及这一流派的哲学家。我弟弟却说,我会是班里考得最好的。你会是班里考得最好的?你啥都不知道。The problem with these stories is that they show what the data shows: women systematically underestimate their own abilities. If you test men and women, and you ask them questions on totally objective criteria like GPAs, men get it wrong slightly high, and women get it wrong slightly low. 这种故事所反映的问题,也是以下数据所表明的事实:女性系统化地低估了她们自身的能力。如果你对男性和女性进行测试,问他们关于类似标准平均成绩这种完全客观的问题,男性会错误地高估答案,而女性则会错误地低估答案。Women do not negotiate for themselves in the workforce. A study in the last two years of people
entering the workforce out of college showed that 57 percent of boys
entering, or men, I guess, are negotiating their first salary, and only
seven percent of women.女性在职场不会为自身利益去谈判。在过去两年,一个关于人们从学校进入职场的调查表明,的男性进入职场时会协商他们的第一份薪水,只有的女性会这样做。And most importantly, men attribute their
success to themselves, and women attribute it to other external
factors. If you ask men why they did a good job, they'll say, &I'm
awesome. Obviously. Why are you even asking?& If you ask women why they
did a good job, what they'll say is someone helped them, they got lucky,
they worked really hard. 更重要的是,男性把他们的成功归功于他们自身,而女性则把成功归功于其他外部因素。如果你问男性为什么他们能把工作做好,他们会说,我棒极了。这是显而易见的。还用问吗?如果你问女性是什么使她们在工作中表现出色,她们会说,因为有人帮助她们,她们很幸运,她们工作非常努力。Why does this matter? Boy, it matters a lot.
Because no one gets to the corner office by sitting on the side, not at
the table, and no one gets the promotion if they don't think they
deserve their success, or they don't even understand their own success.这个问题很重要吗?各位,非常重要。因为如果一直坐在角落,而不是桌边,没人能得到办公室的职位。如果他们认为他们不应享有这成功,或者他们甚至不明白他们自己的成功,没人能得到提升。I wish the answer were easy. I wish I could go tell all the young women I work for, these fabulous women, &Believe in yourself and negotiate for yourself. Own your own success.& I wish I could tell that to my daughter. But it's not that simple. Because what the data shows, above all else, is one thing, which is that success and likeability are positively correlated for men and negatively correlated for women. And everyone's nodding, because we all know this to be true.我但愿这答案是容易的。我希望我尽可能告诉我所共事过的所有年轻女性,所有这些非常棒的女性, 相信你们自己,为自身利益要讨价还价。把握住你的成功。我希望我也能告诉我的女儿。但这并不简单。因为数据反映了一件很重要的事——成功和人缘对于男性来说是积极影响的,而对于女性来说是负面影响的。每个人都点头,因为我们大家都知道这是真的。There's a really good study that shows this really well. There's a famous Harvard Business School study on a woman named Heidi Roizen. And she's an operator in a company in Silicon Valley, and she uses her contacts to become a very successful venture capitalist. 一个非常棒的研究也很好地表明了这一观点。一项哈佛商学院的著名研究是有关于一位叫海蒂罗森的女性。她是硅谷一家公司的负责人,她凭借她的关系成为一名非常成功的风险资本家。In 2002 -- not so long ago -- a professor
who was then at Columbia University took that case and made it [Howard]
Roizen. And he gave the case out, both of them, to two groups of
students. He changed exactly one word: &Heidi& to &Howard.& But that one
word made a really big difference. He then surveyed the students, and
the good news was the students, both men and women, thought Heidi and
Howard were equally competent, and that's good.在年,当时在哥伦比亚大学的一位教授以此为例,把海蒂的名字改成霍华德罗森。他把这两人的案例向两组学生展示。他只改变了一个词:海蒂到霍华德。但这个词就造成了非常大的差异。然后他学生对学生就进行调查。好消息是所有学生们,男生和女生认为海蒂和霍华德都是能力相当的,这很好。The bad news was that everyone liked
Howard. He's a great guy. You want to work for him. You want to spend
the day fishing with him. But Heidi? Not so sure. She's a little out for
herself. She's a little political. You're not sure you'd want to work
for her. This is the complication. We have to tell our daughters and our
colleagues, we have to tell ourselves to believe we got the A, to reach
for the promotion, to sit at the table, and we have to do it in a world
where, for them, there are sacrifices they will make for that, even
though for their brothers, there are not.但坏消息是每个人都喜欢霍华德。他是个了不起的人,大家都想和他共事,大家都想和他去钓鱼。但海蒂呢?不好说。她有点只为自己着想,对政治有点热衷。大家不太想和她共事。这是复杂的。我们得告诉我们的女儿和我们的同事,我们得告诉我们自己相信我们能获得,得到提升,坐在桌边。在这世上,女性要争取这些就得做出牺牲,而且我们必须要这么做。尽管她们的兄弟不用为此而付出牺牲。The saddest thing about all of this is that it's really hard to remember this. And I'm about to tell a story which is truly embarrassing for me, but I think important. I gave this talk at Facebook not so long
ago to about 100 employees, and a couple hours later, there was a young
woman who works there sitting outside my little desk, and she wanted to
talk to me. I said, okay, and she sat down, and we talked.最可悲的是这点很难记住。我将讲个对我来说是个真正尴尬的故事, 但我认为它很重要。在脸书,不久前我给大约名员工做这个演讲。几小时后,在脸谱工作的一个年轻女性坐到我小桌子旁边,她想和我谈谈。我说,好,她坐了下来,我们谈了起来。And she said, &I learned something today. I learned that I need to keep my hand up.& &What do you mean?& She said, &You're giving this talk, and you said you would take two more questions. I had my hand up with many other people, and you took two more questions. I put my hand down, and I noticed all the women did the same, and then you took more questions, only from the men.&她说,我今天学了一些东西。我知道我需要举起我的手。我说,你指什么啊?她说,你在演讲时,你说你将会回答个问题。我和其他一些人举起手,你回答了个问题。我把手放下来,我注意到所有女性都把手放下来,然后你又回答了很多问题,仅有男性参与。And I thought to myself, &Wow, if it's me -- who cares about this, obviously -- giving this talk -- and during this talk, I can't even notice that the men's hands are still raised, and the women's hands are still raised, how good are we as managers of our companies and our organizations at seeing that the men are reaching for opportunities more than women?& We've got to get women to sit at the table.我自己想了一下,如果换成我,谁会在乎这个,很明显,做这次演讲,在演讲中,我甚至没注意到男人们的手是不是还一直举着,女人们的手是不是还一直举着。我们作为公司和组织的经理人,当我们看到男性比女性更加争取机会的时候,我们又做的如何呢?我们得让女性坐到桌子边上。Message number two: Make your partner a real partner. I've become convinced that we've made more progress in the workforce than we have in the home. The data shows this very clearly. If a woman and a man work full-time and have a child, the woman does twice the amount of housework the man does, and the woman does three times the amount of childcare the man does. So she's got three jobs or two jobs, and he's got one. Who do you think drops out when someone needs to be home more? The causes of this are really complicated, and I don't have time to go into them. And I don't think Sunday football-watching and general laziness is the cause.第二条: 让你的伴侣成为一个真正的伴侣。我已经确信我们在职场比起我们在家庭中起了更大的作用。数据也很清楚地表明这点。如果一个女性和一个男性同时全职并有一个小孩,女性比起男性要做两倍多家务活儿,女性比起男性做了三倍多的照顾婴儿的事。所以她有了份,份工作,而他只有一份。当有人必须在家多干活时,谁应该留下来?这个的理由实在太复杂,我没有时间来讲它们。但我也不认为周日看美式足球和日常的懒惰是理由。I think the cause is more complicated. I think, as a society, we put more pressure on our boys to succeed than we do on our girls. I know men that stay home and work in the home to support wives with careers, and it's hard. When I go to the Mommy-and-Me stuff and I see the father there, I notice that the other mommies don't play with him. 我认为理由是更加复杂化的。我认为,作为一个社会, 我们总是更希望男孩子们成功,对女孩子则压力小些。我知道有居家男人呆在家里做内务支持职场妻子这很难。当我去妈咪和我的培训课时,我留意到其他妈咪不愿和那里的父亲相处。And that's a problem, because we have to
make it as important a job, because it's the hardest job in the world to
work inside the home, for people of both genders, if we're going to
even things out and let women stay in the workforce. Studies show that
households with equal earning and equal responsibility also have half
the divorce rate. And if that wasn't good enough motivation for everyone
out there, they also have more -- how shall I say this on this stage?
They know each other more in the biblical sense as well.这是个问题,因为我们得把家务当做和工作一样重要,由于家务是世界上最难的工作,无论男人女人,我们只有平分了这些事,女性才可能留在职场。研究表明夫妻收入相等、 且夫妻分担责任相当的家庭也有的离婚率。如果这数据并不那么鼓舞人,还有更多的在这个讲台我该怎么讲呢?夫妻双方对于彼此的了解,不仅是做爱这么简单。Message number three: Don't leave before you leave. I think there's a really deep irony to the fact that actions women are taking -- and I see this all the time -- with the objective of staying in the workforce actually lead to their eventually leaving. 建议三: 在你离开前别放弃。我认为对于女性所采取行动而言-- 我一直目睹类似情况的发生女性希望留在职场的这个目标,往往导致它们最终不得不离开职场。Here's what happens: We're all busy.
Everyone's busy. A woman's busy. And she starts thinking about having a
child, and from the moment she starts thinking about having a child, she
starts thinking about making room for that child. &How am I going to
fit this into everything else I'm doing?& And literally from that
moment, she doesn't raise her hand anymore, she doesn't look for a
promotion, she doesn't take on the new project, she doesn't say, &Me. I
want to do that.& She starts leaning back. 曾发生这样的事:我们都忙;每个人都很忙;作为一个女人也很忙。她开始考虑生小孩。从她开始考虑生小孩的时候起,她开始考虑为孩子准备空间。我该如何调整孩子这件事和手头上的其他事呢?言下之意, 她不再举起她的手,她不寻求提升,她不找新的计划,她不会说,我,我想做那个。她开始退缩。The problem is that -- let's say she got
pregnant that day, that day -- nine months of pregnancy, three months of
maternity leave, six months to catch your breath -- Fast-forward two
years, more often -- and as I've seen it -- women start thinking about
this way earlier -- when they get engaged, or married, when they start
thinking about having a child, which can take a long time. One woman
came to see me about this. She looked a little young. And I said, &So
are you and your husband thinking about having a baby?& And she said,
&Oh no, I'm not married.& She didn't even have a boyfriend. I said,
&You're thinking about this just way too early.&这是个问题,假设从她怀孕的那日起个月的怀胎,个月的产假,个月来调养休息,快速调整要年,更多的,正如我看到的女性开始过早考虑这事当她们有约会或者结婚时,当她们开始考虑要小孩,这会花相当长的一段时间。一位女性关于此事来找我,我看着她,她显得有点年轻。我说,那么你和你丈夫考虑要小孩了?她说,哦不,我还没结婚。她甚至没有男友。我说,你考虑这个太早了吧。But the point is that what happens once you start kind of quietly leaning back? Everyone who's been through this -- and I'm here to tell you, once you have a child at home, your job better be really good to go back, because it's hard to leave that kid at home. Your job needs to be challenging. It needs to be rewarding. You need to feel like you're making a difference. 但关键是一旦你开始退缩下来,接下来会发生什么呢?每个人都会经历这个。在这儿我告诉你,一旦在家你有了孩子,你真的最好是回到你的工作中去, 因为把小孩留在家太难了,你的工作得有挑战性。它也得有回报。你得感觉到世界因你而变。And if two years ago you didn't take a
promotion and some guy next to you did, if three years ago you stopped
looking for new opportunities, you're going to be bored because you
should have kept your foot on the gas pedal. Don't leave before you
leave. Stay in. Keep your foot on the gas pedal, until the very day you
need to leave to take a break for a child -- and then make your
decisions. Don't make decisions too far in advance, particularly ones
you're not even conscious you're making. 如果年前你没有得到提升,而在你旁边的一个男性得到提升,如果三年前你放弃寻找新的机会,你会变得很乏味,因为你应该紧踩油门,加油。在你离开前别放弃。保住工作。紧踩油门,除非到了你需要为了孩子休假,然后再做出你自己的决定。不要提前做太决定久来做决定,特别是你甚至不知道自己在做怎样的决定。My generation really, sadly, is not going to change the numbers at the top. They're just not moving. We are not going to get to where 50 percent of the population -- in my generation, there will not be 50 percent of [women] at the top of any industry. But I'm hopeful that future generations can. I think a world where half of our countries and our companies were run by women, would be a better world. It's not just because people would know where the women's bathrooms are, even though that would be very helpful. I think it would be a better world.我这一代的女性非常可惜,没能改变高管职位的数字变化。女人还是呆在原地。在任何行业的高管职位中,我们没能达到。但我希望未来一代人可以做到。我认为我们世界上半数国家和半数公司会由女性所领导,那将会是一个更美好的世界。这不仅仅是因为人们会知道女性洗手间在哪儿,尽管这也有非常大的帮助。我认为它将会是一个更美好的世界。I have two children. I have a
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 文章为作者独立观点,不代表微头条立场
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The phrase from Socrates,To be is to do. Never, ever give up.gh_1a1f340b4766集结并分享女性的声音,用思想改变世界。热门文章最新文章gh_1a1f340b4766集结并分享女性的声音,用思想改变世界。}

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